Necessary steps for change

___________Kristina Diener___________ when people come to me, they come to me because they are on pain. I don't make 2nd or 3rd party appointments so when I hear somebody well you know my-my significant other, my partner has a problem he used to come into you okay, this person needs call me if this person wants to come into me they need to get on the phone open their mouth and articulate that. Can I make an appointment for this, no you cannot. Is this person over 18? Yes, and this persons needs to call me. Nevertheless someone when I hear from the horse's mouth they have a problem and they want to do it not because somebody is sending them or they are cornered or this is that. It's that kind of-of aware full, awareness that mindful awareness that cultivates honesty and that honesty is the catalyst for change. So my first question to a person is what needs to change, what has to change first above all and anything else, what do you need to change about yourself that's going to make your life and your days any different from the last? And they don't have to know the answer right and there but they have to some point give me an answer by the time I see them next. They got lots of It from work, they-they don't do it this and that they-they go find somebody else and they can park their past area on somebody else's couch. Because I'm not going to waste my time and I'm not going to waste their time and I'm going to take their money if they want me to help them then they have to help themselves, so we have to be a collaborate team I can do it with them but I will not do it for them and I cannot do it for them, I did for myself so I can help other people do it, and at the time when I overdose not that there was no, I didn't go to rehab where rehab in 1975? My parents would not have ever sent me there anyway so I have figured it out so on that day that I was released in the hospital that was the last day I realized those drugs finished me when somebody gets to that point they are at the end of their hope they can call me then we'll see what I can do for you.