4 secrets to a healthy relationship

I'm gonna be talking to you about some of the secrets to a healthy relationship that you might be unaware. The first secret that I'll share with you is that it's always impossible for someone to be in a healthy relationship with another human being who is not in a healthy relationship with themselves. What does this mean exactly? This mean, someone who's not tuned in to their own needs and is not confident within themselves and loving of themselves will struggle to bring those things into a relationship. And to expect somebody else to fulfill and make one happy and to bring you what you have not done for yourself fills a relationship up with unrealistic expectations and it's more will likely lead to failure. So that will be secret number one. The second secret is acceptance. So, it's very important if you are in relationship with somebody else that you see them for who they really are and don't have any expectation that you are gonna fix them or that you are gonna be able to rescue them or that you are gonna be able to change them anyway because the truth is that people only change when they are ready to change. And often the trigger for change is something outside of him that will create resistance. So, the best way to live in peace and harmony with your partner or spouse or significant other is to accept them for who they are and this is often much easier if you are in acceptance of yourself. The third secret which I will share with you is when you're looking for a mate or when you first start going out with someone, make sure that there is some level of alignment between what is important to you and what is important to him. If your value systems are not aligned, these creates many many places in a relationship which can lead to conflict and some of the points where you want to see that you are on the same page like the kind of lifestyle you need, it could also be about how you would raise children and how you would discipline children. So, there are some of the potential conflict points in a relationship that you would not be aware of before you even decide to take the next step forward. The fourth secret I wanna share with you is about time and space. It is important that couples give another time and space to be on their own. To do certain things independently but also that there's enough time together to share, to connect , to speak about hopes and needs and fears and dreams and even the daily details of whats happening in your day or what are your plans for the day just to stay connected. So it is important that in a relationship you think about whether there's a connectivity rather than either are independents where two people are living separate lives or are co-dependents which means that both parties are dependent on the other for their help and they will be. This can lead also to unhealthy patterns and behaviors and also lead to conflict and power struggles and fears will trigger within the people. So, it is important to acknowledge that a relationship is about two people with their own needs and their own values and their own beliefs which is coming together into a relationship which then become third elements. It is critical that the third element has a voice in the relationship and that is given as much time and attention as the individual people in the relationship.