Making the right decisions

Hey I think anyone whose had a child has struggled and has been overwhelmed and so I say some people talk I think even when they're children are adults they feel too different to that but however my experience of parenthood becoming a father to a new born and I struggles it was almost like you walk through an invisible wall or water or another plane and you couldnt go back once you are through this is a new life and almost you know it was like (inaudible) what happen before this was life, this is a beginning of a new history it feel like a new story, if you're overwhelmed with a pressure of a new born some of the things that we found (inaudible) I personally found useful is (inaudible) I mean you've got to do it particularly people who have had kids end up brought them up and you think well, that (inaudible) pretty good job and the parents is are still healthy and still together well certainly they're still happy however they end it up so what are their secrets get encouragement from them (inaudible) some answers of how to deal with certain things and you are always agree and then might not be your values but the key thing is you know they're okay they survive thank god there and thatll encourage you so that's fine and I guess and all the couple or people that have had kids and doesnt have to be a couple could be an old man or an older lady so that one thing that has really helped us another one is sharing with people and you and know your (inaudible) share with people who also have a new born what are you experiences but not just anyone chose people who you to be friends with, you have trust with some people don't want you to know their insecurities and so you know not judging them but theyll say that everything is fine, the baby sleeps like you wouldnt believe, they might have parents who can take the baby away I need a break or (inaudible) or come to the home even they might not be your situation and if it is well you're lucky it's great but if it's not then you know having people in new situation that you can share your joys and your pain and you're struggles with and you answered this off and what (inaudible) you have, I had a guy played soccer with and coach with Barry White, wonderful, beautiful man lovely family and one of the things that Barry told me you know when we, we had the same fear so (inaudible) and kept the second one and when he has little born you'd kind of lying him bed thinking (inaudible) still alive that made noise and that would be good and when you wake up again you retired but if, they didnt make a noise it was like oh my gosh you know what's happens so getting through that fear and by (inaudible) while 3 years later we kind of (inaudible) just a little bit more he have other health issues but that's another story I guess but (inaudible) good it is important to the path yourself to be gentle with yourself people have also (inaudible) different answers for you and you've got to do what's works for you, you know what you're most comfortable with people have said don't let them anywhere near your bed although never get at it ever we just kind of roll with that one and (inaudible) it's pretty good we're happy with where we're at and there was toilet training yeah you've got to teach them do that well we just kind of help them towards a natural understanding of progression I guess and that seems to have work you know just pretty relate about things I think so another key thing I think is really reaching to with yourself and with each other if you're still in a relationship and a healthy relationship you know because your relationship and your well being and your happiness (inaudible) well being at least is really important so you need to take care of yourself and if you're in a relationship take care if that relationship so being gentle, another key that I think to be aware of us try not to add more stresses in your life than you've already got and it can be a time of change and I with Emily we kind of move houses and I think I might have change job at the same time and doesnt (inaudible) so be gentle with yourself seek help and (inaudible) about us then you'll be fine you'll be a great parent you are.